Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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