Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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