Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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