well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
