What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
