Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
