i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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