would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
