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My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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