You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
