White coat. Heels.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize