can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Randomize
