he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize