it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
