i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
