bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
