Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
