Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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