Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
