How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I just had sex on a roof
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
