She's JV to your varsity
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
