Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
