DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
being pregnant is like rehab
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
