I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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