Swine flu. Run for my life!
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
