so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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