Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize