giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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