sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
