We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize