You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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