I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Text me some of your sweat
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
