only if we run a train.
done.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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