Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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