DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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