i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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