Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
