I want to have your abortion
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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