I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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