Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm too high and old for this...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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