this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
The air taste purple.
Randomize
