gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
