just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
