apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
