i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
