i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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