If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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