theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
