just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize