this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
