Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
