ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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